“Doubt
thou the stars are fire,
Doubt
the sun doth move,
Doubt
truth to be a liar
but
never doubt thy love.”
—William
Shakespeare (Hamlet, Act II Scene II)
I
am not a cynical person. Although I have a reputation for being very gullible,
when my brain processes something, I automatically question it before accepting
it as legitimate. When it comes to love, many people go through a similar
process. The older you get, the longer it seems to take to find something that
you actually feel, deep inside, is real. Conversely, in high school, love
flourishes. Every day someone else has started a brand new relationship, and
teenagers are dipping their toes in the fountain of romance.
What
is unique about high school relationships, however, is that they are typically a
more intense experience than relationships we have as adults. According to BBC,
on average, someone who is 15 will have a relationship that only lasts four to
five months. Studies have also shown that, in teenagers, falling in love has a
similar effect on the brain to using cocaine – and it feels like an addiction.
These relationships also promote face-to-face interaction, which is important
for establishing a sense of self, and encourages sharing and trust which in
turn contributes to maturity.
Love
is what we are surrounded by every day. It has inspired some of history’s
greatest writers, artists, and playwrights – and also the worst. It follows us
on billboards, in movies, as loud gossip in the coffee line-up at Starbucks –
it’s all-encompassing, yet people act as though to have found love is to be
incredibly lucky. If you’ve found “the one”, you’ve stumbled across something
unique.
To
a certain degree, that sentiment is true. To find someone you are compatible
with is a very lucky thing indeed, and even luckier if the relationship ends up
lasting into silver and gold anniversaries. Although some of the love game is
left to chance, there is something else at play: science.
Love
captures our interest, piques our curiosity, and confuses us. Despite the fact
that much is attributed to the brain now, for centuries, philosophers debated
over whether the brain or the heart was the most important organ in the human
body. Aristotle believed the heart was responsible for intelligence and
vitality, but Plato disagreed and argued that the brain was the most valuable
because it was closest to the heavens. Unfortunately for Plato, it was also pointed
out that many less-than-intelligent animals also have brains – as well as
mating practices.
According
to the article Defining the Brain Systems of Lust, Romantic Attraction and
Attachment,
mammals and birds have exhibited three primary emotion-motivation systems in
the brain for mating, reproduction and parenting: lust, attraction, and
attachment. Helen Fisher, who co-authored the article, hypothesized that “human
beings exhibit at least three interrelated, yet distinct, emotion-motivation
systems for mating, reproduction, and parenting: the sex drive, romantic
attraction, and male-female attachment.”
Each
plays a key role in the overall experience, but can be either interlinked or
independent. Put simply, the sex drive is physical, attraction is “falling in
love”, and attachment is the emotional commitment that typically accompanies
long-term relationships.
It
has also been noted that teenage relationships experience the attraction phase
more strongly than adults, and fail to enter the attachment phase, which
contributes to their short-lived relationships. Fisher is a scientist who has
studied the nature of love and the brain extensively.
In
her article, The Nature of Romantic Love, Fisher cites research that has found many
of the rituals performed by birds and mammals when looking for a mate result in
the release of chemicals similar as those exhibited in humans under similar
circumstances: phenylethylamine and monoamine neurotransmitters norlogues,
which contribute to the exhilaration of attraction.
When
a pair of zebra finches are separated as well, both “eat more, defecate more,
and lose weight,” – signs of anxiety and emotion that are comparable to those
displayed by humans who have been separated from their partner. As for
attachment – “concentrations of vasopressin and oxytocin in plasma rise during
sexual arousal,” states Fisher. When these chemicals were injected into
monogamous prairie voles, there was evident stimulation in pair-bonding
behaviour.
It
is difficult to clearly establish how brain chemistry affects emotion, but it
is relatively simple for scientists to examine the outcome of activities on
different areas of the brain. Regardless of whether or not you “believe” in
love, science has proven that love has fascinating effects on our brain
activity. Our minds have been designed to react to the feelings we have when we
are in love. It is part of nature to feel love, to fall in and out of love, to
seek companionship and to move on to something better when your mate is no
longer adequate. We are meant to do all of these things, because it is a
healthy thing to do. Love not only affects your brain, but every aspect of your
body – including your heart, which begins to beat more rapidly as the situation
changes. In love, everything is connected.
Certainly,
love does not always illicit positive emotions, but everything that it causes
us – joy, passion, loss and withdrawal – contributes to making each of us a
constantly evolving person. We will learn from our mistakes, continue to grow,
to experiment, and to have an awesome time doing it.
So
to all of us who have loved, and lost – party on. It’s what we’re meant to do.
//Samantha Thompson, editor-in-chief
//Samantha Thompson, editor-in-chief