The Voicebox

The Voicebox, to quote a famous author, returneth. Look for our Voiceboxers, Rachelle and Mercedes, Tuesday afternoons in the Birch cafeteria. Then we'll publish your opinion, even if it's dumb.

We love the Capilano Courier. We actually do. We read it every week.”                                                   [Yay! –Mercedes]

The squirrels in the parking lot: they’re everywhere. They never stop. They’re moving right now. There’s one over there. And it’s moving.” 
[Second voice]“Squirrels don’t move.”                                        
 [First voice] “That doesn’t make any sense.”

It’s really awkward being one of the only African-American people at this school. Everyone asks my opinion on being the only African-American here. I’m not from Africa, and I’m not from Haiti. Please don’t give me any donations. And please don’t stare at me when I walk behind you because I don’t want to steal your wallet. “
                                                                                                                                          [Sorry for asking for your opinion on being one of the only African-Americans at Cap. –Mercedes]

Caf prices are too expensive.”
 [No kidding? -Giles]

Say no to twincest. It’s unnatural and an easy way for people to poke fun. I mean, hilarious, but kind of awkward.”
[This one came from a pair of twins. -Mercedes]

I actually really enjoy working at the caf. I meet everyone. I once met a guy decked out as a pimp. Like a 1960’s/70’s era pimp with a total pimp hat, a fuzzy leopard print thing goin’ on, and a cane and everything. And he was actually advertising for a documentary that was just made, about boxing. And he was working on his PhD. That would be one of the craziest people I ever met.”                           [Seriously? What the fuck? Talk about random. –Mercedes]

Watch firefly. It’s a TV show. It’s awesome. You should see it.”

I’m hoping to write an article for the Cap Courier. I like the idea that they pay people who write articles. I would like to write an article about the Olympics. Like how teachers are getting laid off, so maybe I’ll write a short story about that.”                                                                                                                             
[A short story, eh? That’s pretty ambitious... I’m sure an article will suffice. But yes, do it. -Mercedes]

I feel like as a society we’ve digressed from reading literature to reading garbage. Every time I see books like Eragon or Twilight it just makes me feel a little sick inside. And then we have classes, like English classes that are all like about Iranian literature, and I have to stop and wonder how they possibly pass it off as an English class. We basically watch Farsi films with English subtitles and read English translations of Farsi books. And I’m like ‘Wow, that’s sucking up to the Iranian population of North Vancouver.’“
[Oh wow. -Giles]

Do you know what really makes me mad? When guys have a crush on you, so they think it’s okay to come up and touch you at any time or, like, sit by you when you’re with your friends, or just constantly be there. That pisses me off like no other. It’s just something that’s really annoying me.”

[Creepy. What kind of guys are you hanging out with? I mean, hello, stalker alert. –Mercedes]

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